PART 2: THIS TIME, I CHOSE MYSELF

For several seconds, nobody spoke.

Lucas stared at the ring lying on the dark blue dress.

Jessica was the first to recover.

She gave an awkward laugh.

“Emma, don’t joke about something like that. Lucas only invited me because of work.”

“I know.”

I looked at her.

“That’s why I’m giving you both exactly what you want.”

Lucas picked up the ring.

“Put it back on.”

“No.”

His face darkened.

“We’ve been engaged for two years.”

“And now we’re not.”

“You think marriage is a game?”

The absurdity almost made me laugh.

In my previous life, I had spent ten years treating that marriage as sacred while he treated my loyalty like furniture—something that would always be waiting when he came home.

This time, I simply opened the door.

“Take the dress and leave.”

Lucas didn’t move.

“Emma, I’m giving you one night to calm down.”

“I don’t need it.”

“You’ll regret this.”

Those words stayed with me after the door closed.

Because in my previous life, I had regretted almost everything.

Leaving university.

Giving up my scholarship.

Rejecting an internship because Lucas said military spouses needed flexibility.

Using my savings when Jessica needed help after an injury.

Waiting outside bases, hospitals and training centers while the two of them built careers and I slowly disappeared.

But canceling the wedding?

That was the first decision I had made without regret.

The next morning, I went directly to my old university.

My student status had not been permanently terminated yet.

In my previous life, Lucas had convinced me there was no point completing the withdrawal appeal.

This time, I submitted it.

Three weeks later, I received approval to resume my studies.

I studied like someone running from a burning building.

Because that was exactly what I was doing.

Every page I finished separated me further from the woman I had once become.

Lucas called repeatedly.

At first, he was angry.

Then confused.

Finally, almost gentle.

“Emma, stop this. I’ll forgive what you said.”

I stared at the phone.

He would forgive me?

“For what?”

“For embarrassing me in front of Jessica.”

I laughed.

Then blocked him.

Jessica came next.

Her message was sweeter.

“Emma, don’t destroy your relationship because you’re jealous of me. Lucas loves you. You should trust him.”

I blocked her too.

For two months, I heard almost nothing.

Then came the military recognition ceremony.

I didn’t attend.

But the photographs reached me anyway.

Lucas in ceremonial uniform.

Jessica beside him.

Her hand resting naturally on his arm.

They looked exactly as they had in my previous life.

The only difference was that this time, I wasn’t standing outside the frame pretending not to hurt.

Someone from our old social circle sent me the photograph with a message:

“Are you really okay with this?”

I replied:

“They’re both single. Why wouldn’t I be?”

Apparently that sentence caused more trouble than any accusation could have.

Within days, people began asking questions.

If Lucas and I had separated, why had Jessica insisted for years that their closeness was harmless because he was engaged?

Why did she suddenly appear beside him at every function?

Why did Lucas look less heartbroken about losing his fiancée than nervous about people noticing Jessica?

Their perfect excuse had disappeared.

Me.

Six months passed.

I completed the credits necessary for graduation and registered for the postgraduate entrance examination.

On exam morning, I arrived forty minutes early.

As I walked toward the building, someone called my name.

Lucas.

He stood beneath a tree in uniform.

I stopped.

“What are you doing here?”

“I heard you were taking the exam.”

“From whom?”

“That doesn’t matter.”

It mattered to me, but I didn’t intend to waste the morning investigating him.

He looked at the books in my arms.

“You actually continued.”

“Yes.”

Something complicated crossed his face.

“Emma, we need to talk.”

“No, we don’t.”

“Jessica and I aren’t together.”

I almost smiled.

“I didn’t ask.”

His jaw tightened.

“She has been transferred.”

“Congratulations.”

“Can you stop acting like you don’t care?”

I looked at him.

That was the problem.

He finally understood.

I truly didn’t.

“Lucas, my exam begins soon.”

“I can wait.”

“I don’t want you to.”

His expression cracked.

“Five years together means nothing to you?”

In my first life, I might have cried hearing that.

Instead, I remembered dying on the way to divorce him after discovering that he had betrayed a marriage lasting more than a decade.

“You’re right,” I said quietly. “Five years should mean something.”

Hope appeared in his eyes.

I continued.

“It means I already gave you enough.”

Then I walked into the examination building.

Months later, the acceptance letter arrived.

I had passed.

Not barely.

My score placed me near the top of the admitted group.

I stared at the letter until my vision blurred.

In my previous life, Lucas and Jessica had convinced me that I wasn’t intelligent enough even to try.

Yet the first time I stopped listening to them, I succeeded.

My life moved quickly afterward.

Graduate school.

Research.

An internship at a defense technology institute.

Then a permanent position.

Ironically, my work eventually brought me into contact with military units.

But now I didn’t enter those buildings as someone’s invisible fiancée.

People knew my name.

Three years after I canceled the wedding, I attended a defense research conference.

I had just finished presenting when applause filled the auditorium.

As I stepped down, I saw a familiar face near the back.

Jessica.

She looked different.

Tired.

The confidence she once carried had disappeared.

“Emma.”

I considered walking away.

Then she said:

“Lucas and I are getting married.”

I stopped.

There it was.

The future trying desperately to repeat itself.

But something was wrong.

Jessica wasn’t smiling.

“Why are you telling me?”

“Because he still keeps your ring.”

I almost laughed.

“That sounds like your problem.”

Her expression twisted.

“You ruined everything.”

“No.”

“You left, and he changed.”

I stared at her.

“Jessica, you wanted him.”

Her eyes reddened.

“You don’t understand.”

Actually, I understood perfectly.

In my previous life, part of their excitement had come from taking something that belonged to me.

Once I stepped aside, there was no forbidden relationship.

No secret.

No wife waiting at home.

Only two ordinary people forced to live with each other.

Jessica lowered her voice.

“He compares everything to you.”

“That still isn’t my problem.”

I walked away.

The wedding happened two months later.

It lasted less than a year.

I learned about their divorce accidentally.

I felt no satisfaction.

By then, I had received an offer to join an international research program.

My life had become too large to revolve around theirs.

But Lucas wasn’t finished.

One rainy evening, almost five years after I had returned to the past, he waited outside my office.

He looked older.

“Emma.”

I sighed.

“What now?”

“I know.”

Something in his voice made me pause.

“Know what?”

“That you shouldn’t have left university.”

I frowned.

“I already figured that out.”

“No.”

He stepped closer.

“I mean I know why you left.”

My body went still.

Lucas pulled an old envelope from his coat.

Inside was a scholarship notice.

My scholarship notice.

The one I had believed I never received.

The date was from years earlier.

Before our planned wedding.

“I found it among Jessica’s belongings.”

My fingers tightened.

“She intercepted this?”

Lucas nodded.

“She told the university you had changed addresses. Then she convinced you that you weren’t good enough to continue.”

Memories rushed back.

Jessica comforting me when no letter arrived.

Jessica saying perhaps rejection was a blessing.

Lucas agreeing that marriage would give my life more stability than academics ever could.

I looked at him.

“You knew?”

“Not then.”

“But you agreed with her.”

His face collapsed.

“Yes.”

That single word mattered more than every apology.

Jessica had opened the door.

Lucas had helped push me through it.

I handed the letter back.

“I don’t need this anymore.”

“Emma, please.”

“You still don’t understand.”

I looked toward the research building behind me.

“My life isn’t good now because you finally discovered what Jessica did.”

I smiled faintly.

“It’s good because I stopped allowing either of you to decide what I deserved.”

Then I left him standing in the rain.

Ten years after my rebirth, I was thirty-two again.

The exact age I had been when I died.

That morning, I drove along the same road where the accident had happened in my previous life.

My hands tightened around the steering wheel for a moment.

Then I passed the intersection safely.

Nothing happened.

No crash.

No darkness.

Just sunlight across the windshield and an ordinary road stretching ahead.

My phone rang through the car speakers.

It was my university.

The research project I had led for three years had been approved for national funding.

They wanted me to head the new laboratory.

I pulled over after the call.

For a long time, I sat there crying.

Not because I remembered Lucas.

Not because I remembered Jessica.

I cried for the twenty-two-year-old girl who had once believed love required becoming smaller.

In my first life, I had died carrying divorce papers.

In this life, at the same age, I carried an appointment letter with my own name printed across the top.

Professor Emma Lin.

Laboratory Director.

I looked through the windshield.

Ten years earlier, I thought being reborn meant I had been given another chance to expose two people who betrayed me.

I had been wrong.

The greatest revenge wasn’t watching Lucas and Jessica destroy each other.

It wasn’t making Lucas regret losing me.

It wasn’t proving Jessica had always envied me.

My second chance had never really been about them.

It was about returning to the moment before I abandoned myself.

This time, I finished my education.

I built my career.

I traveled.

I made friends who didn’t need me to fail so they could feel successful.

And when love eventually returned to my life, I didn’t sacrifice my dreams to keep it.

Because I finally understood the lesson death had taken an entire lifetime to teach me:

The wedding I canceled wasn’t the future I lost.

It was the future I escaped.

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